Once upon a time, the word “Fail” was used mostly by scientists and teachers as a label for mistakes and disappointments. Then, at some point in the 21st century, the Internet claimed ownership of it, and it became the favorite word of 12 year old kids and the chronically unfunny. These imbeciles would have you believe it is not only a verb (“To fail”, “Do not fail”, etc.), but that is is also a noun as well, as demonstrated by the following piece from deviantART.

Misaki thinks you fail by ~LaceyTheSnowLeopard

This picture, drawn by the subject of a previous article mere hours after said article was posted, boldly states that the viewer is “AN EPIC FAIL”. Harsh words coming from an entirely talentless pre-teen with an anime obsession! The inclusion of “epic” (Another word forever tainted by cliche-humping shits from the Internet) to extenuate exactly how much of a “fail” the reader supposedly is is a helpful addition. In fact, it’s especially helpful to me, as it happens to support a theory of mine that I developed a few years back.

As clearly illustrated in this equation, using the word “Epic” alongside the word “Fail” instantly clears the described subject of all fault, as the person who has made the claim clearly lacks the qualifications to make such an assessment. Which is to say, they are subhuman scum, and do not deserve the privilege to walk the earth let alone label things as failures. Clearly, this is a rather bold claim to make on my part, and clearly warrants proof. Well, why don’t we go ahead and use LaceyTheSnowLeopard’s own picture to prove her worthlessness, subsequently proving my theory?

In this piece, Ashley (Born on May 9th, 1996) fails to correct any of the legitimate criticisms pointed out to her in our previous article, despite the piece clearly having been inspired by said article. Her trademark gigantic pupils are as large as ever, and the character’s nose is unaccounted for. The neck is clearly incapable of supporting the weight of the character’s oversized head, not to mention the weight of her unattractive head of hair.

Before you chalk any of these obvious mistakes up as “stylistic decisions”, observe Ashley’s inability to depict joints bending at realistic / logical angles (In the case of her elbows / knees), and her ineptitude at drawing fingers. Her intent is clear, and you can tell what she was trying to draw, but her execution is sorely lacking. The character’s shoes lack detail, as does her shirt and jeans. She couldn’t even be bothered to finish covering up a mistake she made drawing the character’s mouth, as indicated by the remnants of what used to be a larger mouth.

Through these errors, Ashley indicates her ability to accept constructive criticism: An ability productive members of society must utilize in order to improve themselves. In fact, the presence of said errors serves as an outright refusal to accept the advice of others, leaving her to continue making the same mistakes and to toil away in obscurity for the rest of her days as a so-called “artist”.

But hey, just because she’s worthless doesn’t mean she can’t socialize with other worthless netizens. Enter midnightstar66, who some of you might remember as being the subject of another previous DCQC article. From the picture’s comments:

Wow! It just so happens that midnightstar66′s unwarranted / meaningless approval happens to prove another old theory of mine!

What a great day for science! Unfortunate that it also happens to be a poor day for art, which the both of these worthless girls will continue doing a disservice to until they grow up and move on with their miserable lives. You can toss around words like “fail” as often as you want and at whoever you please, but it won’t make criticisms any less legitimate or your piss-poor art any better.

The best advice I can offer is to stop acting like the children you technically are, and start acting like the adults you will eventually grow up to be. That means learning to listen to others even if they aren’t giving you pats on the back and unwarranted praise, and / or giving up on art entirely. If you insist on picking “one or the other”, I’d personally recommend the latter, as there is clearly no future for you in art even if you should apply the former bit of advice to your time on deviantART.

Today we look at yet another “kawaii neko desu ^_^” mangaka anime artist who goes by one of the most original usernames we’ve seen to date: LaceyTheHedg–oops, I mean LaceyTheSnowLeopard, my bad. Because the cookie-cutter naming standard (XTheY) of furries everywhere wasn’t cliché enough, right?

PLUSHIES :D by ~LaceyTheSnowLeopard

The first thing you may have noticed by looking at this monstrosity is that Lacey forgot to include a nose. Perhaps Lacey forgot to include it because she was excited to show her friends just how ♡sugoi♡ her drawings are and couldn’t be bothered with such trivial endeavours. However, a lack of nose just didn’t cut it for Lacey. In an attempt to make her ORIGINAL CHARACTER “Misaki” that much more kawaii, she gave it cleft lip and fangs. Now, I don’t know about you, but having no nose, a cleft lip and fangs just isn’t enough for me. Luckily, Lacey also gave this mutant giant chipmunk-esque cheeks and eyes half the size of her face. Not to mention a neck that’s about ready to snap.

“Misaki’s” eyes are perhaps the most interesting aspect of this image. Those are the largest fucking pupils I ever did see. And look at the Japanese staple “eye shining” she included; it’s like Lacey couldn’t make up her mind and made two opposite light sources. Of course, there’s no way of knowing that because she didn’t bother shading “Misaki”.

I suppose making “Misaki” look like she has Fetal Alcohol Syndrome was intentional after all.

Patricia Martin by ~LaceyTheSnowLeopard

Actually kinda like how this turned out…

If her goal was to make “Patricia Martin” look like a freak, she gets an A+. Of course, I’m sure that’s not what Lacey had in mind.

It’s immediately obvious that Lacey has a problem with eyes. It looks like Patricia has a cataract in her right eye. And what’s with the left “eye”? Was she too lazy to draw a second eye and simply took out her permanent marker and drew a giant manga anime “wink”?

Look at that fucking mouth. I suppose it’s an improvement from cleft lip, but that thing is gigantic. You can fit a God damn baseball in it for Christ’s sake. It’s so big there was no room left for Patricia’s chin. Did her own mouth manage to devour her nose?

She even managed to mess up on the simplest of tasks and gave Patricia a twig neck. Even her colouring is a mess. Did she intentionally leave white gaps to give it the illusion of a light source reflecting off of the clothing?

Hiyori Tamura by ~LaceyTheSnowLeopard

Something has gone horribly wrong in this drawing. She doesn’t have a nose! Wait… silly me. None of her characters have noses. So what’s the matter with this picture…? I can’t seem to… WAIT! That’s it! It’s the giant eye that desperately wants to break free from the frames of what would appear to be glasses.

You’d think “Hiyori Tamura” would be screaming in pain due to that burst blood vessel in her eye, but it seems Lacey’s characters have the remarkable ability of not realising they are in excruciating pain while maintaining the kawaii-ist pose possible.

For some reason, Lacey doesn’t bother including the whites of a character’s eyes. Upon closer inspection, it looks like Hiyori doesn’t even have a pupil. No wonder she needs glasses, right?

Lacey SonicChannelish Style by ~LaceyTheSnowLeopard

Well, this is rare! It looks like Lacey included the sclera in this image depicting her fursona. Too bad she didn’t include decent colouring.

Now, aside from the pant leggings that look like they’ve been sewn together, the dislocated left hand, the unsymmetrical eyelashes, the lack of a neck and the backwards right ear, why on Earth would anyone give their fursona a comb over?

Hey, at least her fursona has a nose, right?

Chippettes Diamond Dolls by ~LaceyTheSnowLeopard

Sorry this looks like crud on a webpage. DX

This is by far Lacey’s most disturbing picture.

Just what does she have against eyes, anyway? Does she have the slightest idea of what an eye even looks like?

I can’t decide on whether or not the small pinkish triangles on all three of these characters’ faces are mouths or noses. But they do remind me of Halloween Jack-O-Lanterns where you would always carve out chunks of the pumpkin to make a/an nose/eye/mouth. As if the pupil-less, giant one-colour iris wasn’t terrifying enough. I don’t want to know what kinds of other demented things Lacey thinks about.

If you haven’t noticed by now, the characters in her drawings all seem to have debilitating conditions. This image is no exception. The one on the left looks like it has cerebral palsy while experiencing a spastic attack whereas the two on the right appear to have Down’s syndrome. One could conclude that this says something about Lacey’s own intelligence.

It’s difficult to say whether Lacey intends her characters look like abominations while putting them in the most kawaii pose possible or that it’s purely accidental all of her characters look retarded. Whatever the case may be, her drawings are simply terrible. LaceyTheSnowLeopard should not be drawing.

Sophie-The-Skunk is among the countless other angst-ridden teenage furries who love the largely overrated vidya game Sonic. She’s a carbon-copy of every other Sonic fan on dA, but has somehow managed to amass quite a large following. How? Let’s find out.

Photoshop Typhlosion by ~Sophie-The-Skunk

This was for a project in media productions at school. [...] How does it look?

It looks terrible, if you don’t mind me saying. The only way she could have made this picture look any more ridiculous is if she lifted a picture of a meerkat off of The Google, recoloured it and then added a picture of fire to its back and softened up the edges around the flame so it looks cute and cuddly. Then she could find a background that’s a complete mismatch to the landscape she chose her meerkat to be perched on. For good measure, she could abuse Photoshop even more by changing the colour levels and using preset filters to get that perfect “realism” look she was aiming for.

She would have had better results if she simply wrangled up a dead meerkat off the side of a highway, stuffed it, threw some clown make-up on it and lit its back on fire.

Update: I got a 100% on this. A+

Never mind, this was definitely an A+ effort. Good job!

Merry Christmas 2009 by ~Sophie-The-Skunk

This masterpiece really captures Sophie’s imaginative use of real-life backgrounds and Photoshop lighting effects. Her unparalleled skill at making both Sonic and Shadow look nearly expressionless and lifeless on what is arguably one of the most emotional days of the year takes exceptional talent. My only true gripe is the lack of mistletoe — I would have really enjoyed seeing the two hedgehogs making out. I’m quite surprised she didn’t make this artistic rendering of a near-flawless Sonic and Shadow more like the hentai and fanfiction she undoubtedly reads at any of the SonicxShadow fansites she undoubtedly visits.

Who am I kidding, this is terrible. Hedgehogs aren’t blue, they’re rainbow-coloured with wings.

Defeat by ~Sophie-The-Skunk

This picture was gonna be something else but after I sketched out the basic construction I didn’t get back to it until I was in a really bad mood.

I can’t tell if this drawing is illustrated to represent Sophie’s suicidal tendencies, her violent fantasies she’d like to enact against all of those ignorant baka gaijins who make fun of her in both The Real World and OTI, or a thinly disguised vore fetish she’d rather not talk about.

What I do know her image represents is poor, angsty scribbles on a notebook that attempts to look “edgy”. What is that supposed to be, anyway? Her fursona “Sophie the Skunk”? Sonic? Shadow? Silver? Any other official or fan-made recolours that resemble appearances strangely similar to Sonic? I demand an explanation! But not really, because I’m sure the character in this image fits all of the above in the most original way possible.

One thing I don’t understand is why “Sophie” deems it necessary to constantly brand all of her artwork in a red font using the worst typeface ever: Comic Sans. No one would dare to steal your shitty artwork and take credit for it, you don’t need to try and prevent it.

AAH, A SPIDER by ~Sophie-The-Skunk

I’m not entirely sure why this… skunk(?) would have its ear pierced, but it probably goes hand-in-hand with a not-so-discrete furry fetish she displays in all of her drawings. What’s more erotic: a human with an ear piercing or an animal with human-like qualities? Exactly. I think you get my point, right? As to why a spider crawled up this hedgehog’s fox’s wolf’s meerkat’s skunk’s whatever-this-thing-is’ ass is beyond me. Arachnophilia just isn’t my thing, I guess.

Dumb Werehog by ~Sophie-The-Skunk

I could nitpick on the out-of-place and completely ridiculous looking trees, the terrible hands, the uninspired grass or the cheap paint bucket approach to colouring. But I’m more concerned with the way this “Werehog” is looking behind itself and raising its buttocks like a cat in heat. Do they actually mate? Are skunkhogs really able to fertilize a werehog’s eggs? This is blowing my mind.

Well, perhaps I wasn’t all that fair to Sophie. After all, her deviantART does say she is an “animator”. Let’s give her another chance — I mean, maybe she does suck at still images, but multiple frames of animation must be a breeze for her! She’s probably a very talented and humourous young girl — I couldn’t possibly think all 9,329 (and counting) of her YouTube subscribers are wrong!

Sonic Comix 3 by MobianAngel

Never mind. I hope no one actually watched that trash for the entire 7 minutes and 52 seconds. Seriously, you’d think something that took over three months to make would be a little better in quality? Well it seems Sophie found a way to make a long-term project look and sound like something a 10-year-old girl shat out using Windows Movie Maker.

So, how did Sophie manage to amass such a large following with sub-par “art”? It’s simple: the Internet has no standards. None whatsoever. Does that surprise you? Mix and match your favourite video game/TV show characters and fandoms and go create some Japanese-inspired “art”. Talent and effort isn’t required. Surely you’ll be successful somewhere on the web.

This is Sayuki-Chan14 .. Oh, wait. That’s the wrong picture. My bad. Here’s the one I meant to post.

This is Sayuki-Chan14, a “slightly accomplished Artist” who was “inszpired” by “Hebeiko”. As you can see from the first two pictures, she tends to have a distorted view of reality together with an affection for anime – a winning combination, as proved by her gallery (and the galleries of ~90% of deviantART users).

Grey by ~Sayuki-Chan14

Her first submission, “Grey”, already shows where is going: Crude MS Paint pictures of random Anime characters. Grey, the “evil twisted half brother of Zaiky” (Another “original” character by our wannabe artist) according to Sayuki-Chan14, can be seen here demonstrating one of his undoubtedly several birth defects: His right arm sprouts out of his chest, rather than his shoulder. Evidently, Grey is very angry about this, or is losing a battle against constipation. It’s a shame how Sayuki-Chan14 exploits disabled people just to portray them as helpless, angry people.

Sin by ~Sayuki-Chan14

“Sin” continues that tradition by poking fun at blind people. Sayuki-Chan14 now misuses Christian views of morality by titling the picture “Sin”, thus declaring blindness a sin. Of course she tries to prevent such interpretations by declaring Sin her fursona (“I go by Sin”), but we all are smart enough to realize what her real intentions were. And what can you do with such a coarsely drawn crayon masterpiece?

Sin remix by ~Sayuki-Chan14

Oh, right – “improve” it by running it through the most simple Photoshop filters. This “remix” offers even more xenophobia than the original – why is “Sin” suddenly a brunette? Does that mean brunettes are more beautiful than blondes? Or perhaps her hair is some sort of a black hole (Like that guy in the purple robes from Inuyasha), thus implying that brunettes are Satan worshipers? Hawking worshipers? The world may never know.

Rainspasmatic Blobs by ~Sayuki-Chan14

Apparently Sayuki-Chan14 isn’t only a xenophobe but also a drug addict. How could you else explain this MuShroom Paint picture?

Aye, I had made these new little things I call blobs.. and then you got the Mushrooms which look Trippy.. and BUBBLES! Enjoy ^^

Fuck Pogs. “blob” is now the game that will bother and amuse future generations. CIRCLES… with two CIRCLES on them. So simple.. So playful.. So amazing..

Hidden behind these bars of drug addiction, xenophobia and otakuism is a genius who has dreams and aspirations like every other teenager on this world.

ahahah just kidding your talent will never develop and all your art deserves is a sad badly animated wink

It is my regret to inform our readers that the article “The Fashion Stylings of ‘Allychan’” has been removed from the site, as the result of a lawsuit against me filed by the very subject of the article. Despite the legality of the article (Which I do intend to prove in a court of law if necessary), I have decided to take the entry down as a gesture of good will towards Ms Bellofatto.

I apologize for any inconvenience my removal of the article may cause.